We have a blog?!

Really? Since when? :)

Yep, it's been almost a year since I posted. Does anyone read this anymore? Doubtful. I thought I had stopped blogging because I was spending more time on Facebook. While that's partly true, I think it's more that I didn't have much to say. I haven't been taking as many pictures and didn't feel like posting about just the positive stuff anymore. I guess better than saying "life sucks" I just didn't say anything at all. And it's not really that we have it that bad...many more people have much larger problems...but you know me, I always say "good" when you ask how I am. If I do say something different it's usually about something temporary like a headache. I never share if something is really bothering me. So really the last year has been ok but full of the ups and downs of life....

Connor was in a big show at the Longmont Theatre Company in December - he was Randy (the younger brother) in A Christmas Story. I think I posted about it a bit when he first got the part. He LOVED it, had no qualms about performing in front of 250 people for 9 shows. But it was a huge time commitment for both of us and I was really glad when it was over. Spending so much continuous time with him and with more adults than kids around really highlighted a lot of the issues I'd been explaining away for years...you know...since he was born. :) So in January we began facing all the problems head on. We started paying for extra tutoring in reading because he was just barely keeping his head above water and not at all enjoying it. We met with his teacher, the principal, the school psychologist and the school counselor. We saw his pediatrician. His teacher filled out paperwork and so did we. All of that took time and, eventually, we all decided (or in our case, admitted) that he has ADHD. Even typing that still breaks my heart. Those letters have such a stigma to them and the last thing I want is for my outgoing, compassionate, happy little boy to be thought of as 4 little letters with a lot of crazy meaning behind them.

But he started a medication to treat it. And guess what? A very different kid emerged. One that likes to read. And write. And draw. And sit still for longer than a minute. It hasn't been without its trials, but medicine was definitely a step in the right direction.

The summer was good. Second grade started and he is making great strides in his schoolwork. Not long ago he told us his eyes water a lot when he's reading and that he thought he needed glasses. We took him to be tested and, sure enough, he is slightly farsighted and could use glasses especially when reading. He picked out the coolest glasses in the place, of course, and loves wearing them. Continuing down that "watery eye" path we also took him to an allergist. Turns out he's allergic to most trees, grasses, cat and dogs. Yep, we have a dog. And trees. And grass. :) They're not bad enough to need allergy shots at this point but we'll keep an eye on the allergy index and use over the counter allergy meds as needed.

And his schoolwork has improved so much that we agreed he could audition for an acting company. He had a great audition and the director thought he was so mature (!) that she placed him in a higher age group!

Now we're dealing with some issues when the medication wears off at night - lots of negotiating, complaining and low self esteem. After dark a switch goes off and he suddenly thinks no one loves him. It's so odd given his usual bubbly, brave and cooperative outlook but is apparently a common side effect. Sigh...

Logan is good :) He started kindergarten after a long debate about whether he would be ready or not. His late July birthday had us wondering for a year or so whether we were making the right decision sending him at 5 instead of "red shirting" him and waiting until 6. Academically I still think we made the right decision - he's reading, writing and doing math much more and better than Connor was at this age. But he has a super sensitive heart and cries easily. He gets tired in full day kindergarten but we're working through it...

Ever since my company cut 15% of our pay and then another 7% of that as cost saving measures for the company a couple years ago, our finances have been totally screwed up. My pay has been restored but we're still trying to recover from the years of less money. Stressful. Jeremy took a second job delivering newspapers so he was sleeping less which made me not sleep as well. Lack of sleep plus money worries do not exactly equal loving romance :) We're working through that too.

So, to sum it all up, I've pretty much felt like a horrible mother and wife for the last year.

Oh I forgot how our dog recently had to have super expensive emergency surgery on a big gash on her neck. She's been wearing the "cone of shame" for a couple weeks now. I can handle blood on my kids but for some reason on Bailey my stomach turns just thinking about it. She has to sleep in her kennel at night because otherwise she spends hours shaking the cone and doing whatever she can think of to get it off. I miss her being curled up next to me on the bed. And now that we know Connor is allergic to dogs we're supposed to be keeping her as far away from his bedroom as possible. :( And put hard flooring in his room, which will cost money of course. It's a vicious cycle.

Well, this post has just been all sunshine and unicorns, huh? That's life, I guess. You win some and you lose some. Here's hoping we win a few more soon...

P.S. I'm sure I'll regret posting this in the morning, so read fast :)